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Switched up how I ask follow up questions after watching a detective interview on Netflix
I used to just ask 'what do you mean by that' when someone dodged a question at work. It never got me anywhere, people just repeated the same vague stuff. Then I caught this interview show where the detective would wait in silence for like 10 seconds after a half answer. Tried that last week with a patient who kept dancing around why they missed their meds. They finally opened up about feeling dizzy and scared of side effects. The quiet pause made them uncomfortable enough to fill the space with the real answer. Anybody else find that silence works better than pushing harder?
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faithf773mo ago
The quiet pause made them uncomfortable enough to fill the space with the real answer" - that's the part that really clicks for me. I started doing something similar with my team when they'd give me vague updates on projects. Instead of drilling them or asking what they meant, I'd just nod and stay quiet for a solid five or six seconds. Most times they'd jump back in with the actual problem, like "well, actually we're stuck on the scripting part" or "the deadline feels too tight." It works way better than chasing them around with questions, because silence feels like a blank check for someone to write their own honest answer into.
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patricia_singh813mo ago
Hmm, not my experience. I find silence just makes people anxious, not honest.
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